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Realization Part 1: Prooving Love
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CHAPTER 10: The Yard

"....'Carter, and is very openly a positively gay man. God, he is so dreamy'..." Steven heard someone saying as he walked into his history classroom alone, seeing that someone had pryed through Justin's bag.

"What are you doing?" Steve asked, nearly demanding an answer.

"We were just going to borrow a pencil, honest.. but found something much better; a journal of sorts. It's the Americans'. Listen to this Carter, you might like it.. seems as though Mekins has a bit of a crush on you. In fact he really wants you from what we read.."

Just as the jerk in the class was finishing his sentence to the amusement of about 10 others who were lapping it all up, Justin Mekins came back into the classroom. Just one look to his desk showed his opened bag, and he looked to the traitors who held his prized posession.

"What the f*ck do you think you're doing?" Justin yelled.

"We were just looking for a pencil to borrow.." Replyied the hopeless.

But in a hard grown American accent, Justin simply cut him off. "Are you crazy? I could kill you for that."

"I uhh.. it was just a laugh.." Said once again in an attempt to redeem himself, but to no end. Before he was finished the sentence, his face was being impacted by a well trained and hardened fist. The first boy was to the ground in an instand with blood dripping from his mouth. A second boy came at Justin next hoping to use the suprise to his advantage, but Justin was easily able to avoid the extremely wide right hook by ducking, and firmly planint a left jab to the guys crowned jewels.

With two down, there was quite a commotion being created. Another of the boys in the room grabbed a book or something from a desk, Steven couldn't quite see what it was, and had it over his head about to land it square to the top of Justin's. But quicker that the aggressor, Justin made a quick punch to the other kids' gut, causing him to bend over, allowing Justin to easily bang his opponents' head against his knee breaking the nose, and causing him to fall down as victim number three. Although it was a quick duel, all the boys in the room were down, leaving only girls to look sad and nearly frightened. Justin had just grabbed his notebook when Mr. Alcock walked through the door all exausted from obvious running.

"What the hell is going on in here? Carter? Mekins? Barnickle?" Alcock just looked around the room for someone to speak up. "Answer me someone or else everyone is going to be suspended!"

"They rooted through my bag, found a personal belonging of mine which has some rather personal details in it, and continued on as far as to read it outloud to everyone here. As I returned from the bathroom, I demanded it back, and was attacked. Everything you see here was in my own self defense, that last one.." Justin said cleverly pointing to the one that Alcock had addressed as Barnickle, "he even picked up an object and was about to clobber me over the head. I don't know about here, but back home, that would be possesion of personal property, assalt, assalt with intent to mame, and battery."

"I uh.." Mr. Alcock whirrled off his wheel a little bit just by Mekins' own professionalism with the events.

"I think I need to call my father and have him come down here. Although I don't think that he will really be happy to leave the yard to deal with this..."

"Um.. Mr. Mekins.. um.. what yard?"

"Scotland Yard of course. My dad is an FBI agent for the US, currently assigned to assist with terrorist threats to your country or something.. Him, his partner, and a few other agents are here for the same purpose, placed in different cities. It's not like a big secret or something.."

"I don't think that calling your father will be nessisary Mr. Mekins. Just clean up that blood on the floor Barnickle."

And with that, Alcock left the room. Steve was amazed. How could someone use such power to his own use for good?

"Justin, I didn't know that your father was an FBI agent anti-terrorist specialist...."

"He's not..." Justin said nearly laughing. "He is a lawyer for the FBI, and accepted a job over here for the Yard after a sweet win back in the states."

With that, Mark, Wendy, Jessica and nearly the rest of the class came into the room along with the teacher and after reacting in their own way settled in and class was started.
-------------------------------------------
John Dixon had been having the weekend that of a nightmare. Feeling forced once again to be seeing Christina Lindman, he felt such the fraud once again to the entire world about him. One thing was for sure though, after driving past Kevin and Dave and purposely ignoring them, they now didn't even want to talk to him. All was for the best right? That is what he is supposed to be telling himself. But if all was for the best, then why did he feel like he just had a red hot poker shoved through his gut? He knew why. He still was in love.. the kind of love that can never and will never die inside of someone. And he knew that Steve felt it too; he just wouldn't admit it to John.

If only his parents weren't being to anal retentive about all this, he could come clean and be with Steve, but he can't risk loosing all that he knows as his in life. But if he doesn't run that risk, he will loose the only real thing that has ever matter to him; his love. So with that, along with the elongated bell signaling the end of the school day, John Dixon knew what he had to do.

"Steve, can I give you a lift home?" John said, trying to act like just another mate of his.

"Um no... Linda has been picking me up, my mum is giving her money for fuel, and she'd really be mad if I weren't here." Said Steve trying not to be in such close proximity to John. However there was one question that bothered him. "Just by the by, what car?"

"Didn't I tell you? My mum and dad got me a car for doing so well in school and for being such the perfect son..." John nearly wenced while trying to get that sentence out.

"Oh. So I suppose they don't know?"

"Oh god.. of course not." There was a good deal of time before John was able to work the courage up in himself to be able to pull Steve next to him with his arm over Steven't sholder just like a simple friend. "We need to talk about us.." He said in a somewhat lower voice. And for half a second, John would have sworn that he saw a glimer of hope along with a smile come across Steves' face; but then vanish like everything else had.

"Johnny, there is no more us.." Steven started to rebut, but Dixon would have none of that.

"Well there should be. Look. After I got off the phone with you the other night my dad came into the room and asked if it was you on the other end of the line. I told him that me and you are mates. So see there? That is progress.."

"What that we've made love.. or so I thought it was love and not just sex.. and all we are is nothign better than mates?"

"Listen will you?" John said quite loudly. "He then procedded to say he was glad that we were only mates, because if I was gay, then I would get swiftly kicked out of the house, car taken away, my oxford chances taken away, and the like. I love you. So much it hurts; but I just can't turn my back on my life comepletely... I'm not as strong as you." John said now nearly in tears as Linda's red corvette rolls up.

"Steve!" Linda called with a huge smile on her face untill she sees that it wasn't some new cute hunk with his arm secured over Steven's sholder... it was John Dixon.

"Hi Lins, be right there." Then he turned back to John.

"Steve.." John started, "I see it in your eyes, even the way you try to look away from me...I know you still love me, it's why you haven't let go. It's you I want with me, why can't you see that?"

"Johnny. Yes I do love you..."

"Then why can't.."

"Why can't we what?" Steve said slinging John's arm off of his sholder, starting to back towards Linda's car. "Just have sex? Or what? Yes I love you. Always have and will. But I can't be put back to where everything is so fragile and secretive that it has to be whipered. Like anything stronger than a whisper and it will all vanish; I know 'cause it already has once. And I just can't do it again. Im sorry..."

And with that Steven ran over to him kissed John's cheek and hoped into Linda's car and didn't look back, with a tear rolling down his cheek. A tear to match one of the many on the face of John 'f*cking superman' Dixon.






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