The Longest Day
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CHAPTER 4:
Steven opened his door just in time to see his father charge past, still putting his dressing gown on and muttering various obscenities under his breath. Steve felt very tense, as he always did when the phone rang this late at night. It would either be bad news, as when his grandma died or his dad’s shop got broken into, or it would be someone else. If it was for him, his dad would get angry. If it was a wrong number, his dad would get angry. If it was for either of his parents, his dad would be civil and then get angry later. Either way, something bad was about to happen.
“Steven!” came the furious shout. “It’s for you!”
Steve winced, and then quickly went down the stairs. As he took the handset from his dad, he did everything possible to avoid the cutting glare he knew he was being submitted to.
“Hello?”
“Er, hi.”
It actually came as no surprise to Steve that it was John on the other end of the line. In some ways he had known it would be him from the minute the phone had first rung, though he had been hoping that it wouldn’t be. Steven looked at his father, and despite the risk of causing further aggravation, he shot him a look to let him know that he wanted some privacy. It was more than a little surprising when his dad simply went back upstairs.
“Steve?”
“Oh, er, sorry. Just had to get rid of my dad.”
“Oh, right. Is he angry?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry. I just had to call you.”
“I thought you might.”
“Steve, I need to see you.”
“Uh-huh?” Even though he was trying to sound hurt and cold, a huge smile had formed on Steve’s face.
“Can I come round?”
“Now?!”
“Er, yeah. It’s really important.”
“Johnny, it’s two in the morning!”
“I know, I know. But this can’t wait.” Steven heard John take a deep breath. “Steve, this has been the worst day of my life, and I just want to end it well.”
“It’s past midnight. You’ve already ended it.”
“Steve, please. I’m serious.”
“OK, OK. Look, I’ll meet you outside the front door. I don’t wanna wake my dad again.”
“Thanks Steve. I’ll be round soon.”
Steven hung up the phone, and briefly paused to think. A creak from the stairs made him turn suddenly, though he knew exactly who would be there. The grim expression on his father’s face reminded him of when the police brought him back from the woods, but this time he would be able to tell the truth.
“Going somewhere?”
“Dad, there’s something really important I need to sort out.”
“What?”
“It’s Johnny. He needs to talk.”
“I see.” Graham’s sour expression stayed on his face for a few moments, but then a slight smile took it’s place. “Well just tell him to work on his timing.”
“I’m sorry Dad.”
Graham turned and went back upstairs, leaving Steven to ponder another strange encounter. Then he quickly followed his dad up, hastily putting some proper clothes on over his boxers and T-shirt. After the application of some deodorant and some hurried work with his hairbrush, he slipped back downstairs and out the door, ready to face the future.
* * * *
“Hi” said John, having stood in front of Steven for what seemed like an eternity.
“Hi” Steve replied.
“Thanks for seeing me.”
“Yeah, well, let’s go somewhere else. I don’t think my dad will forgive me for waking him a second time.”
They quickly walked to the bus stop on the main road, sitting down on the rickety bench usually occupied by a gaggle of white haired ladies.
“So” said Steven, never really intending to finish the sentence.
“Steve, I need you.”
“For what?”
“I need you…I need you so that I can feel happy. I need you so that I can have the strength to be honest with everyone.”
“Honest about what?” Steven was gonna make him work.
“Honest about being gay, about being in love with you.”
“Why?”
“What?” The question had taken John by surprise.
“Why are you gonna be honest with everyone?”
“I thought that’s what you wanted.” John was thoroughly confused.
“This isn’t about what I want. It should be about you.”
“But it is!” exclaimed John. “Steve, you won’t let me love you unless I’m honest. But I can’t not love you, so I have to be honest.”
“But Johnny,” sighed Steven, “it’s gotta be about more than that. I don’t want to force you into something you’re not ready for.”
“I am ready for it. I am.”
“What, you’ve decided that in the space of an afternoon?”
“Yeah!” cried John, briefly forgetting to keep his voice down. “From the minute you walked away from me I felt like shit. I tried to lie to people, to cover everything up, but all the time I felt so sick, you know? All I wanted to do was just be honest, just stop deceiving everyone.”
“So why didn’t you?”
“Because I didn’t think you’d be there for me afterwards. I thought I’d be alone.”
“I was alone.”
“No you weren’t. Yeah, I wasn’t there for you, and I hate myself for it. But you had Linda and Jessica and everyone else. No-one knows about me.”
“Your dad does.”
“Yeah, he does now.”
“You told him?”
“No. You did.” John had fixed Steve with an intense stare.
“Johnny, I didn’t say anything to him. He just came out and said it, and I guess I just couldn’t lie well enough.”
“Steve, Steve, I’m not angry at you. I’m glad. I’m glad he saw through me, and I’m glad he came to see you.”
“You are?”
“Yeah. It’s put an end to all this shit. He knows about me, he’s not angry, and he wants me to be myself.” John stared at Steven for a bit longer, and then smiled. “Steve, if my dad’s OK then I don’t care about anyone else.”
“Not even Kevin and Dave?”
“No. They can either like it or lump it. I mean, I’m not even sure I like Kevin very much anymore.”
“Then why hang around with him?”
“Because I always have.” John sighed. “Steve, if you’re willing to give me another chance, things will be different. I know I’ve said it before, but you must be able to see that this time is for real.”
“Johnny, I can’t go through this again.”
“But you won’t have to. Tomorrow I’ll go and see all my mates and just get things out in the open. In fact, I’m gonna do it anyway, but it’d be good to know I could get a hug from you afterwards.”
“Just a hug?” said Steven, with a quirky smile on his face.
“Well, whatever. Just being with you would be enough.”
“OK, OK.”
“Is that a yes?” asked John, his voice full of excitement.
“Yeah, that’s a yes.”
John’s eyes filled with tears, but a huge smile formed on his face. Steven leaned towards him and they embraced in a long hug. By the end Steven’s eyes were wet as well, but it was obvious from both of their faces that there was no sadness to be found between them.
“There is just one thing Johnny.”
“What?”
“If you ever kick me again, I’ll have your bollocks for earrings.”
“Oh Steve, I’m so sorry. I just can’t believe…”
“Johnny, it’s OK. I forgive you.”
“I don’t. I never will.”
“Well, that’s your choice. But it’s all in the past for me.”
“Steve, it was only a few hours ago.”
“As I said, all in the past.”
Steven and John shared another hug, but this one was calmer and more gentle. It eventually became a passionate kiss, though it ended suddenly when Steven pulled away and stood up.
“What’s up?” asked John, the worried look back on his face.
“Nothing. I just don’t wanna go any further tonight. We should leave that until you’ve told everyone.”
“Er, yeah. OK.”
“Call me tomorrow when you’ve done it.”
“I will.”
“I better get back. My dad will probably be lying awake waiting to hear me come in.”
“Yeah.” John smiled at Steven. “Thanks Steve.”
“For what?”
“You know what.”
“Yeah, I suppose I do.”
Steven was just turning to leave when John spoke again.
“Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“You don’t have pierced ears.”
Steve briefly looked confused, but then realisation dawned on him. A huge grin spread across his face as he answered.
“I’d give them to my mum as a present. She seems to like that sort of natural jewellery.”
With that, Steven turned and quickly walked away. John watched him go until he was out of sight, and then stood up and slowly lumbered off in the other direction. His mind was suddenly very peaceful, with only the lingering image of Steven’s smile occupying him. He thought of how thing’s had turned out, and how they would be by the end of the next day. A warm feeling spread through him, even though he was now quite cold, and he hugged himself. He had thought they had gotten too close, but today, the longest day in his life, had shown him just how much closer they were going to be from now on. He couldn’t wait.
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